Sunday, June 7, 2009

5.3 Lest Ye Be Judged

Summary and Spoilers

Albert has used his bottomless well of charm to make his prison sentence profitable and, well, pleasant. When he is not hustling inmates, he is purposely losing chess matches to the prison governor (who also happens to chair the parole hearings). But two days before his planned release, his governor friend has a stroke and is replaced with a hard-line woman. She has no sympathy for Albert, especially since she has just discovered evidence of his in-prison gambling. She tells him he is an old man whose talents are well behind him, and he should expect to spend the rest of his life behind bars.

Expecting Albert to be out shortly, Mickey plans a special con for Albert. They will con an old-school high court judge. How? Well, obnoxious Justice Kent presided over a robbery case where the thieves had stolen 30 million in gold. Kent gave a lenient sentence to one of the thieves in exchange, Mickey believes, for getting some of the gold. But his informer was killed in prison before Kent could find out the location. Now both thieves are dead, and Mickey’s plan is to resurrect one and make Kent believe he can lead him to the gold – for a fee, of course.

There’s an early complication; Ash has stood before Kent, so he has to work behind the scenes. Mickey asks Ash to keep Sean with him, to give him pointers, stating that Sean is not ready for a mark like this. Ash immediately gets suspicious that Mickey just wants to work alone with Emma; Mickey says he is not getting involved. Ash takes the opportunity to ‘teach’ (aka hustle) Sean while they work together to hustle a roulette wheel gambler.

Albert tries to clean up his act by leading a prayer group and going to choir practice, but the governor isn’t buying it. She finds fresh evidence of gambling behind a peeling poster in Albert’s cell, and then finds a wad of cash hidden inside Albert’s miniature craft house. Things are looking bad, but things are rarely as they seem on Hustle. Behind the scenes, Ash and Sean have been compromising the psychologist parole board member, whose love of the roulette wheel leads him to get caught cheating. The second board member is the high court justice. And the third board member, the supposedly un-connable governor, has been conned by Albert.

By unanimous vote, Albert is released from prison, where he joins the rest of the team for a ride home in style in a stretch limousine.


This new team is growing on me. They are quite comfortable, and I like the characters that Emma and Sean are playing. It’s probably good to get some younger, great looking people into the cast.

Hustle Quotes

Ash: Say hello to my lucky phone.
The Mark: Is that one of those mobiles?
Ash: What, the ones with the laser scanner inside, reads the spin of the ball with a microcomputer, does the sums for ya - might be.
The Mark: I’ve read about those -
Ash: Keep your voice down. Don’t look at my arm, look straight ahead. Understand?
The Mark: Where’d you get it from?
Ash: Don’t ask me that, ask me how much I made last week.
The Mark: How much –
Ash: 82 thousand pounds! Now, ask me if I’m happy.
The Mark: Are you happy?
Ash: No. Do you want to know why? Course you do, it’s an intriguing tale. The casino’s onto me. Start getting funny looks from the security people. If I keep winning like this, they’re gonna shut me down. I won’t be able to place a chip within a 50 mile radius of the Edgemere Road. I can’t find a way out of my predicament. Can you?

Emma: What do you think – for Albert’s holiday?
Mickey: Um, very nice. Oh, not Indonesia, though. He sold the air force some fighter jets in the 70s and they still haven’t arrived.

Governor: ‘The Cavendish Cats Benevolent Fund’?
Albert: Yes, I just hope from the wrongs I’ve done some good can come – to cats.

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